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                 |  |  | Last of the Hard-hearted Ladies |  |   
                |  |  | I was 
                          always afraid of you other grandmothers lovingly
 baked pies for grandchildren;
 you kicked my ass
 for leaving socks on the floor:
 it made no sense
 
 until that day, fifteen,
 and no one home but you,
 I asked you for a cigarette,
 and you said yes,
 and talked with me all afternoon
 as though I were a man,
 and never told a soul.
 
 Years later, I understood
 you'd simply always seen the man
 leaving socks on the floor
 and coats on chairs, and all
 you'd ever asked
 is that I see it too.
 
 Oh, you bitched about my hair
 and my moustache, never liked
 my politics: that socialistic crap
 but you grinned like the devil
 when I held my ground.
 
 I didn't say a word today
 when Dad and Uncle Merv
 read that stuff from the Bible
 you'd scoffed at all your life,
 remembering the times we'd sat
 listening to the hymns in church
 next door, smoking cigarettes:
 
 they think their faith will help you,
 and maybe it will, and anyway
 it can't hurtand the grief,
 as least, is real.
 
 So don't be angry with me, Grandma:
 if I'd had it our way,
 I'd have lit up another cigarette
 and passed it to you.
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                |  |  | Copyright © 1980 by W. D. Ehrhart The Samisdat Poems, Samisdat, 1980
 This poem currently appears in  Thank You For Your Service: Collected Poems,  McFarland & Company, 2019
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